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Geographical Grins
State Mottoes
Alabama: Hell Yes, We Have Electricity
Arizona: But it's A Dry Heat
Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything
Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedy's Don't Own It Yet
Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids
Georgia: We Put The "Fun" In Fundamentalist Extremism
Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, But
Leave Your Money)
Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes ... Well Okay, We're Not, But The
Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States
Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It
Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax
Brackets)
Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians
Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes... And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
Mississippi: Come And Feel Better About Your Own State
Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-wing Crazies, And
Very Little Else
Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest
New Hampshire: Go Away And Leave Us Alone
New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent pets
New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An
Attorney ...
North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable
North Dakota: We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
Ohio: At Least We're Not Michigan
Oklahoma: Like The Play, Only No Singing
Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
Tennessee: The Educashun State
Vermont: Yep
Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?
You live in the Deep South when...
- You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
- "ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.
- After five years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are Ya?"
- "He needed killin' " is a valid defense.
You live in Colorado when...
- You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
- You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he
stops at the day care center
- The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.
You live in the Midwest when...
- You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
- You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
- You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"
- When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was
different!"
You live in Florida when...
- You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
- All purchases include a coupon of some kind - even houses and
cars.
- Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
- Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people.
photo funnies
Meet Foofie, 82 years young, retired from the Sun City Chorus Line Dancers. She has worked a variety of jobs that require physical effort, committed to dancing, fitness and maintaining her flexibility and volunteer work with animals. Foofie has been an inspiration for all to keep busy and "Use your muscles so you don't lose them."
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Top 10 Reasons to Become a Nurse...
- Pays better than fast food, though the hours aren't as good.
- Fashionable shoes and sexy white uniforms.
- Needles: It's better to give than to receive.
- Reassure your patients that all bleeding stops....eventually.
- Expose yourself to rare, exotic and exciting new diseases.
- Interesting aromas.
- Courteous and infallible doctors who always leave clear orders in perfectly legible handwriting.
- Do enough charting to navigate around the world.
- Celebrate the holidays with all your friends...at work.
- Take comfort that most of your patients survive no matter what you do to them.
6 Rules of Life from Charles Sterling
- Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas.
- Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
- If he/she says that you are too good for him/her - believe it.
- Never pass up an opportunity to pee.
- If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!
- Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because
of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the other
person was right about you.
cartoon courtesy of 'Stitches''
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